


I just got you back

by MadamPoptart



Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-04
Updated: 2016-06-14
Packaged: 2018-07-12 06:44:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7089673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadamPoptart/pseuds/MadamPoptart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Listen to me. That wasn’t you. It wasn’t. You can’t blame yourself for something that you had no control over.” Steve whispered softly bringing his hands up to cup Bucky’s face “You are worth so much more than this. I hate what they did to you. I hate what they made you do and Buck I wish it was me instead of you. You never deserved this.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Steve let out a sigh as they took off in the plan, the damage was done. He had fought those who he called friends for Bucky and damn he didn’t regret one second of it. This was Bucky.  They rode in silence for a while before Bucky finally broke the silence

“What’s going to happen to your friends?” He asked from somewhere behind Steve. Steve was concerned and Bucky could obviously sense that. He always knew when something was bothering Steve, no matter what happened. Bucky still knew him and nothing could change that. Not Hydra, not war, not anything.

“Whatever it is, I’ll deal with it” Steve replied and he meant it. If that meant going back and breaking them out of prison after all this was over with then so be it.

“I don’t know if I’m worth all this, Steve” Bucky murmured softly, sorrow practically radiating from the man behind him. Steve turned his head towards the brunette, trying to think of the right words to say and thinking how could Bucky thing he wasn’t worth this. Bucky was worth all of this and more. Steve would do anything for him, no matter the price he’d have to pay for it.

“What you did all those years… It wasn’t you. You didn’t have a choice. “Steve said softly watching the man he loved looking out the window with such sorrow.

“I know…. But I did it” Bucky replied emotion thick in his voice as he turned his head to meet Steve’s eyes. Bucky couldn’t shake the guilt or the pain that followed him around like a dark cloud wherever he went but with Steve the cloud seemed to recede a little bit and he could breathe again. Steve broke the eye contact to switch the plane on auto piolet and rise from his seat before kneeling in front of Bucky.

“Listen to me. That wasn’t you. It wasn’t. You can’t blame yourself for something that you had no control over.” Steve whispered softly bringing his hands up to cup Bucky’s face “You are worth so much more than this. I hate what they did to you. I hate what they made you do and Buck I wish it was me instead of you. You never deserved this.”

Bucky’s eyes filled with tears and he leaned their foreheads together, his hands coming up to clutch the back of the blonde’s neck before pulling Steve up and on to his lap so he could hold him properly “I missed you”

“I missed you too Buck” Steve replied as he brushed his thumb over Bucky’s cheek. Bucky looked up at Steve searching his blue eyes and Steve search his in return. No matter how their bodies changed their eyes never did. Sure there was more pain and guilt hidden there now but never did they change.

Bucky pulled Steve’s lips to his own, needing to feel his lips again after so long. He had missed this. He had missed Steve.  Bucky gripped Steve’s hips as he poured everything he felt over the last 50 years into it. Steve responded eagerly and it felt like they were back in Brooklyn all those years ago, laying in their apartment with the curtains closed and trying to keep quiet so they didn’t wake the neighbors. He finally got his punk back.

-

Steve was forced to return to his seat to land the plane as they arrived and once they were landed they both grabbed the things they needed before opening the door. As the door opened, Steve looked over at Bucky and smiled as a memory filtered through his brain “Remember that time we had to ride back from Rockaway Beach in the back of that freezer truck?”

“Was that the time we used our train money to buy hot dogs?” Bucky asked amusement covering his features at the memory and Steve grinned back at him.

“You blew 3 bucks trying to win that stuffed bear for a redhead” Steve said remembering that day fondly. The redhead was to cover up the fact that the two of them were on vacation together. Bucky was always worried someone would find out.

“What was her name again?” Bucky asked

“Dolores. You called her Da.” Steve replied, the only reason he remembers was because he was so jealous of the way she giggled and hung off his arm.

“She’s got to be a hundred years old by now” Bucky snorted

“So are we, pal” Steve grinned and gripped his shoulder before he started to exit the plane but Bucky grabbed his arm, pulling him into a kiss.

“You were always so cute when you were jealous” Bucky whispered against Steve’s lips before Steve pushed him away playfully then exited the plane. They stepped out in the howling wind and trudged through the snow to the little bunker.

“He can’t have been here more than a few hours” Steve stated

“Long enough to wake them up” Bucky commented as they entered the bunker and walked through until they boarded the elevator. As they descended Steve couldn’t take his eyes off Bucky and vice versa for Bucky.  

“I love you” Steve blurted out “In case…”

“Shut up nothing is going to go wrong” Bucky insisted stepping closer and they both nodded to each other before the elevator came to a stop. They creeped through the dimly lit bunker ready for anything to attack and alert for anything when they heard straining metal from behind them. Steve crouched shielding them both and Bucky pointed his gun in the direction of the sound.

“You ready?” Steve questioned

“Yeah” Bucky answered. What surprised them both was it wasn’t a super solider coming to kill them but Tony Stark opening the elevator doors. Tony walked towards them, his suit revealing his face

“You seem a little defensive” Tony said

“It’s been a long day” Steve replied approaching his friend slowly

“At ease solider I’m not currently after you” Tony smirked at Bucky and really Bucky just wanted to shoot him

“Then why are you here?” Steve asked his eyes narrowed slightly

“Maybe, your story’s not so crazy” Tony mumbled

“Maybe” Steve snorted

“Ross has no idea I’m hear. I’d like to keep it that way. Otherwise I got to arrest myself” Tony said nonchalantly

“Well that sounds like a lot of paper work” Steve said and Bucky only lowered his weapon after Steve gave the signal to do so. He still didn’t trust Tony whether there was a truce or not.  The three of them walked through the bunker, Tony in front and Bucky in the back. Bucky was still ready to open fire on Stark if he even looked at Steve the wrong way.

“I got heat signatures” Tony stated

“How many?” Steve questioned

“Uhhh one” Tony replied as they entered a larger room shadowed in darkness but was soon illuminated to reveal 5 dead super soldiers before a raspy voice came over intercom

“If it’s any comfort they died in their sleep” The voice said as they went further into the room “Did you really think I wanted more of you?”

“What the hell?” Bucky whispered under his breath

“I’m grateful for them though, they brought you here” The voice stated and a light turned on, signaling where the voice was coming from. Steve threw his shield but it bounced back at him “Please, Captain. The Soviets built this chamber to withstand the launch blast of UR-100 rockets.”

“I’m betting I can beat that” Tony spoke up

“Oh I’m sure you could, Mr. Stark. Given time but then you’d never know why you came” The voiced drawled

“You killed innocent people in Vienna just to bring us here?” Steve asked angrily as he walked towards the chamber finally getting close enough to see the man on the other sides face

“I thought about nothing else for over a year” The man whispered as he stared Steve straight in the eyes “I studied you. I followed you but now that you’re standing here, I just realized there’s a bit of green in the blue of your eyes” Bucky frowned deeper if that was possible. He most definitely didn’t like anyone else noticing that about Steve. No one should be close enough to notice. “How nice to find a flaw”

“You’re Sokovian” Steve stated finally placing the accent “Is that what this is about?”

“Sokovia was a failed state long before you blew it to hell. No. I’m here because I made a promise“ The man sneered

“You’ve lost someone” Steve stated and the man’s face darkened

“I’ve lost everyone and so will you an empire toppled by its enemies can rise again but one which crumbles from within that’s dead forever” The man stated and Tony and Steve gathered around the little screen.

The tape labeled “16 December 1991” played revealing Bucky killing both of Tony’s parents. Bucky looked away, guilt clawing at his insides as he both heard and remembered that night. Once the tape ended Tony launched himself at Bucky only to be stopped by Steve “Tony. Tony.”

Tony turned back to Steve tears collected in his eyes behind concealed anger “Did you know?” He asked quietly

“I didn’t know it was him” Steve replied

“Don’t bullshit my Rogers! Did you know?” Tony asked angrily

“Yes” Steve admitted causing Tony to yank himself from Steve’s grasp and after a moment he turned and attacked hit the blonde so he went spiraling to the ground. Bucky immediately put up his shot shooting at Tony only to be deflected and then throwing punches. Tony grabbed Bucky by the throat and flew them serval feet away before he pinned him to the ground. Bucky let out a sound of pain before Steve threw his shield at Tony. The battle waged on once Bucky was down Steve fought him and once Steve was down Bucky fought him.

The fall of the wall caused Tony to be pinned “Get out of here!” Steve shouted to Bucky who stood and started to run with Tony chasing after him with missals. Steve stood in the path “It wasn’t him Tony! Hydra had control of his mind”

“Move!” Tony shouted and started to fly towards Bucky but Steve grabbed his foot to prevent him

“It wasn’t him!” Steve shouted and broke the flyer on Tony’s foot but before Steve could get to Bucky who was climbing out of there Tony brought rocks down on him before flying up to fight Bucky. Tony threw Bucky into a wall and was about to shoot him when Cap. got in the way shielding them both from the damage and knocking Tony down.

Steve helped Bucky up “He’s not going to stop” he murmured before kissing Bucky quickly “go” Bucky hesitated before nodding and resuming climbing while Steve launched himself at Tony sending them both tumbling to the ground. Tony managed to get himself on one of the ledges and aimed at the hinge holding open the roof before shooting it so it fell leaving Bucky nowhere to go. Once Tony got up there he put Bucky in a head lock “Do you even remember them?”

“I remembered all of them” Bucky replied guilt dripping in his voice before Tony dropped them but was intercepted by Steve sending Bucky on a ledge and Tony and Steve on the ground below. The concrete dipped and there were openings where you could see snow. Bucky groaned and sat up looking at his lover on the ground “Steve!” he called and the blonde slowly pulled himself up. Tony rose as well and approached the Capitan

“This isn’t going to change what happened” Steve reasoned

“I don’t care. He killed my mom” Tony snarled before attacking Steve. Tony had Steve pinned before Bucky launched himself at Tony hitting him with Steve’s shield before long Bucky and Steve were fight against Tony together. Then all in one moment Tony shot Steve with one of his blasters leaving him in a fist fight with Bucky. When Tony finally managed to throw Bucky to the ground he was surprised when he saw Steve still wasn’t getting up. Disregarding the fight Bucky crawled over to Steve  

“Steve” Bucky pulled the Captain’s body up and into his arms “Steve!”  Steve eyes opened with a flutter blood staining his white teeth red and his skin was so pale. Bucky quickly scanned Steve’s body only to find a hole in the center on his abdomen.

“B-bucky” Steve coughed out and Bucky’s eyes were instantly filled with tears “I-I love y-you.”

“Steve no. No. Steve please I love you” Bucky pleaded as Steve gave him a bloodily smile “Dammit Steve no! I just got you back please”  Steve cupped Bucky’s cheek with a trembling hand and Bucky leaned down kissing his lover softly “I just got you back”

“B-bucky” Steve gurgled out before he just stopped. His body going limp in Bucky’s arms and the brunette shook his head violently as he rocked back and forth with Steve’s body clutched to his chest “I just got you back. Please I love you please Steve don’t leave me. Come on you punk I just got you back. I just got you back Steve I just got you back” Bucky was freely allowing the tears to slip down his face as he screamed and clutched on to his lover.

His entire body shook with pain. His world crashed around him for the second time in his life. The first was when he fell from the train and the second was now, holding Steve’s lifeless body in his arms. This was the worst pain he had ever felt. Bucky lost a part of himself when Steve breathed his last. Bucky didn’t know he was screaming, he didn’t know he was crying, he didn’t know anything anymore not without Steve. There was nothing left. Steve was the only thing he had and now he was gone.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Tony stared at the scene before him eyes wide. What had he done? He had killed Captain America, he had killed Steve Rogers, and he had killed his friend. It was like time frozen and all Tony could do was watch, trying to process what had just happened.  Emotion washed over him like tidal waves, pain, regret, sorrow, guilt, anguish. Out of every one of the Avengers Steven Grant Rogers was the best and he deserved to live more than any of them.

Steve was the one who scolded people for cursing and was the one who soothed Wanda after a tough fight. Steve was the one that brought a smile to anyone’s face and the one to fight for the right side. Tony felt like vomiting or screaming or blowing something up or downing an entire bottle of Whiskey. This was all his fault. Tony almost didn’t notice when The Winter Solider started to speak to Tony.

“Kill me” There wasn’t anger, just anguish. Bucky didn’t let go of Steve’s body, clinging to it like a lifeline and he didn’t look up from Steve’s face. All he did was continued to look at Steve as he spoke, tears slipping down his cheeks. Tony fell to his knees his helmet coming off as he stared at the crumbled body of Steve.

Tony sat there simply staring at the body. Neither Bucky nor Tony moved. Bucky simply held Steve tightly and pressed his forehead to Steve’s whimpering softly before he looked up at Tony his eyes were vacant “KILL ME” Bucky shouted this time, something like anger in his voice, he set Steve’s body down gently before he advanced towards Tony and pushed him “It should have been me” he shouted and punched Tony in the face hard. Tony attempted to fight back but Bucky was too strong. “He was your friend and you killed him trying to get to me” Bucky threw Stark against the wall and then he started punching Tony with his metal arm “Why didn’t you kill me?! He didn’t deserve this. Steve was the one with the future not me”

Bucky continued to punch and beat Tony until he dropped him to the ground. Wiping his eyes as he looked over at Steve and his anger dissolved “He wouldn’t want me to kill you. I’m tired of killing” Bucky turned to the cement colons and punched through it with his metal arm “Like it was supposed to happen”

“Steve wouldn’t want this. He would want you to live” Tony spoke through his swollen face, barely able to move as he watched the winter solider

“I don’t want to live in a world where Steve Rogers doesn’t exist” Bucky breathed out before kneeling beside Steve once more “I’m coming baby I’m coming to meet ya” Bucky pressed a kiss to Steve’s lips before walking towards the edge

“He wouldn’t want this” Tony tried again

“Steve was the only thing that made sense out of all the shit in the world… but now he’s gone… and so am I” Bucky whispered before stepping of the ledge. Tony shouts and tries to catch the brunette but just misses, bowing his head as he watched Bucky Barnes fall. As Bucky fell he smiled and closed his eyes “Till the end of the line Rogers”

Captain America and The Winter Solider were dead.

-

Tony doesn’t remember the ride back. He doesn’t remember retrieving both the bodies either but somehow he ended up back at the Avengers base with the bodies of Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers. Those who fought with Steve were released due to the evidence and now Tony waited for the avengers to assemble once more. Just like Steve would have.

“Where are they?” Sam asked immediately walking through the door all of them had arrived together and they were informed Steve and Bucky were at the base. No further information on the matter. The group all filed into the briefing room and were seated staring up at Tony some with anger and others with confusion.

“It was an accident” Tony spoke softly as he began to explain the situation the group remained silent as they listened. When Tony finished he was near close to tears, the guilt had been clawing at his insides.

Wanda was the first to break the silence with a scream of insults in Russian before she launched herself at Tony ready to attack but Tony just hugged her while she angrily cried out. Sam stands quickly, breaking the glass sitting on the table before shaking his head, obviously trying not to cry as he leaves the room.

Natasha sits with her legs crossed staring at Tony, her features schooled to show no emotion regardless of what she is feeling inside and Clint is running a hand through his hair and down his face. Clint closed his eyes taking deep breaths to collect himself. Vision watched the people around him, processing what this meant and how he was supposed to be reacting.


End file.
